Twinkees were a defense For a murder binge The killer had a high sugar count But now he's on the mend He sold his soul to the hostess She turned his brain to mush The lawyer said sure, he Killed 'em judge. It was just A sugar rush!
Fat on the bacon Wool on the lamb Flies in the ointment Murder in the ham Hardened hearts and arteries Salt block in the Spam Lord save us all from this Bad Indigestion
Well, would we do the things we do If there weren't poison in our blood Would we hurt our fellow man While consuming all this crud Break our vows Go to war Put mankind to shame If a chemical imbalance Weren't coursing through our veins
Fat on the bacon Wool on the lamb Butter on the biscuits Grease in the pan Dyes in the candy Tubas in the band Lord save us all from this bad indigestion
The god of our benefits is The great horn O' plenty (Cornucopia) Moves it's great vegetable hand Puts a little fruit in all of our baskets Helps us function better in the can
Montezuma's revenge has Got us on the run Double meat velveeta cheese Between two hot cross buns Take seltzer and a prune Pepto Bismal and a Tum And look into the crap we eat You'll find a smoking gun